Hi Friends!
I want to talk a little bit about how to talk to your students with behavior problems. It might seem intimidating to hear that you have a first-grader who has a tendency to fight, swear, and elope. I know that the very first student I had scared me a little, even though he was a kindergartener. His IEP was not completed, he had no goals other than those set by his classroom teacher, his parents refused to keep a schedule with him, and even though they took him to get meds, the meds were either not the right dose or had to keep changing, or he didn't take them at all. Every day was a struggle until I figured out how to talk to him. Each kid is different, but there are a few things that are pretty straightforward and work across the board.
You HAVE to show up! These kids need structure in so many different areas. Their time, food, and emotional stability all need to be structured. I promise they are likely to not trust you right away, as most of the kiddos in schools nowadays have experienced more trauma and distrust than I can even fathom. Try your best to just be a good person. Show up, hold them accountable, and treat them like a normal kid. These are your first steps in building a relationship with your kiddo that will give them structure and consistency at school.
Use the same language everywhere. If you are focusing their behavior visuals on "red choice and greed choice", then you need to use that language everywhere. You are retraining their brains to think in a way that is going to not only alter their behavior but also alter their thought processes as well.
Example: "Madi, I can see that you are not ready to come in from recess yet, but you are not making a GREEN CHOICE by refusing to come inside."
Remember- they are just kids. Too often adults give kids way too much responsibility. No child should experience the amount of trauma that today's kids do- but unfortunately, we cannot do much about that. All we can do is give them a space that is safe and a place to learn how to properly cope with the big feelings life can make you feel. One of the best things I've heard going around recently is "let them be little." I think this is no different at school. Let them play. Let them sing. Let them dance. Let them make mistakes, Let them learn. Let them have big feelings. Show them love- you never know much they need it.
BEHAVIOR IS COMMUNICATION... Listen to it.
https://challengingbehavior.org/docs/whatworks/WhatWorksBrief_3.pdf
https://www.petitjourney.com.au/10-reasons-a-daily-routine-is-important-for-your-child-and-how-to-set-one/
https://www.scarymommy.com/what-let-them-be-little-really-means
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